I...I must have gone into a healing coma, to fix whatever this Byron person did to me.
[He frowns thoughtfully, and a bit forlornly. When he goes home, he'll never remember this. Never remember that he got it all wrong. He'll still think that she walked out on him in disgust, and that that's all that happened.
[ she laughs a little, watery with tears - of grief and relief all at once. Wanker, making her cry. ]
I built a crystal radio, out of what was left of the Cybership. Sent out an SOS, every hour, for... well, a while. And then the TARDIS appeared, but it wasn't you. [ she shakes her head ] Six. It was Six, not that I knew that. Blue jacket, blonde curls, fondness for cats. It was just-- yesterday, I suppose, I hadn't-- and being back here is just--
[ She tightens her hold on him again, kissing his cheek ]
How long was I gone this time? It wasn't long, was it? Have we lost anyone else?
[Really, he wants to say more, but he's so bloody confused. He'll have to ask Six about that later. If even Six knows anything about it. The blue jacket was from later years.
Still, Charley's here. She's back. He hasn't lost her forever. He cups her cheek, lovingly brushing his thumb along the soft skin there.]
Only a day. [There's a little, watery laugh of his own.] Thankfully, I only embarrassed myself in front of two people this time. In my defense, it had been an emotional day yesterday.
Oh, that's right, that was... yesterday, blimey. [ She kisses him briefly, a hand on each cheek, then looks up at him with concern ] How did it go? Of all the times for me to up and disappear...
[Ugh, yesterday. His body tenses a bit at the memory, unsure if he's ready to fall apart.]
The good news is that Eleven went home for a while, and found a way to save Gallifrey. I don't end up killing my own people in my future.
The bad news...
[His voice cracks, wavers and breaks, and he tries to blink away the tears that are threatening to spill over again. He had wanted to fall apart on Charley the night before, but after what she's been through, it's hard to bring himself to do it.]
I found out about my death. It's...not as heroic as I might have liked.
[He takes a deep, shaky breath.]
It fits how my life had been going for a while before I came to Asgard, I suppose. Failing to save someone, reviled, used...
[The dam begins to break and the tears start spilling down his cheeks.]
Choosing to die because the universe doesn't need the Doctor anymore. I gave up. I just...gave up, Charley.
[ She tugs him down, pulling his head to her shoulder and running her fingers through his hair ]
Oh, my darling, darling man. [ she kisses his hair softly ] It's all right. It is. No matter what happened, even if you... chose it, you became the Doctor again. All right? It... [ she huffs a little, sadly ] I'm so sorry.
[He clings to her, letting everything out. Every bit of pain he'd been holding onto and had only let out in shouting in all the months he's been in Asgard. Great sobs of grief, frustration and pain shook him as he wept on her shoulder.
Thank the gods for Charley. She'd been a part of his very soul for so long, and now she was here again. He could let it all go with her arms around him.
He didn't have to be strong for anyone right now.]
[ Charley just holds on to him, standing in the hallway, murmuring nonsense and softly humming snatches of lullabies and absent melodies.
This had been building for a long time. Probably since he read her letter, if not before. She would absolutely let him get it out of his system. Hopefully it would help. ]
Shhh, I've got you. I've got you, it's all right. It'll be all right.
[There is so much he needs to let out, if he's honest. He can be emotional, but it mostly comes out in anger. Rarely would he ever cry, despite all the traumas he's suffered through this incarnation. Everyone he'd failed, everyone he'd lost, he'd pushed it down as best he could. He would hold himself together and either try to go numb, or shout a bit when he couldn't.
Not today. Today, he's just going to let it all go. And yes, Charley has him. It would be alright.
After he's cried himself out, he sags a bit and just holds onto her, fingers curling into the fabric of her shirt. When he finally speaks, his voice is barely a whisper.]
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[He frowns thoughtfully, and a bit forlornly. When he goes home, he'll never remember this. Never remember that he got it all wrong. He'll still think that she walked out on him in disgust, and that that's all that happened.
But, wait. What?]
Found you? Who found you, then?
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I built a crystal radio, out of what was left of the Cybership. Sent out an SOS, every hour, for... well, a while. And then the TARDIS appeared, but it wasn't you. [ she shakes her head ] Six. It was Six, not that I knew that. Blue jacket, blonde curls, fondness for cats. It was just-- yesterday, I suppose, I hadn't-- and being back here is just--
[ She tightens her hold on him again, kissing his cheek ]
How long was I gone this time? It wasn't long, was it? Have we lost anyone else?
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[He looks startled. What the hell?]
I don't...remember any of this.
[Really, he wants to say more, but he's so bloody confused. He'll have to ask Six about that later. If even Six knows anything about it. The blue jacket was from later years.
Still, Charley's here. She's back. He hasn't lost her forever. He cups her cheek, lovingly brushing his thumb along the soft skin there.]
Only a day. [There's a little, watery laugh of his own.] Thankfully, I only embarrassed myself in front of two people this time. In my defense, it had been an emotional day yesterday.
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The good news is that Eleven went home for a while, and found a way to save Gallifrey. I don't end up killing my own people in my future.
The bad news...
[His voice cracks, wavers and breaks, and he tries to blink away the tears that are threatening to spill over again. He had wanted to fall apart on Charley the night before, but after what she's been through, it's hard to bring himself to do it.]
I found out about my death. It's...not as heroic as I might have liked.
[He takes a deep, shaky breath.]
It fits how my life had been going for a while before I came to Asgard, I suppose. Failing to save someone, reviled, used...
[The dam begins to break and the tears start spilling down his cheeks.]
Choosing to die because the universe doesn't need the Doctor anymore. I gave up. I just...gave up, Charley.
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Oh, my darling, darling man. [ she kisses his hair softly ] It's all right. It is. No matter what happened, even if you... chose it, you became the Doctor again. All right? It... [ she huffs a little, sadly ] I'm so sorry.
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Thank the gods for Charley. She'd been a part of his very soul for so long, and now she was here again. He could let it all go with her arms around him.
He didn't have to be strong for anyone right now.]
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This had been building for a long time. Probably since he read her letter, if not before. She would absolutely let him get it out of his system. Hopefully it would help. ]
Shhh, I've got you. I've got you, it's all right. It'll be all right.
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Not today. Today, he's just going to let it all go. And yes, Charley has him. It would be alright.
After he's cried himself out, he sags a bit and just holds onto her, fingers curling into the fabric of her shirt. When he finally speaks, his voice is barely a whisper.]
I don't know what I'd do without you here.