[It's a long while before he manages to get enough control over himself to even speak, and even then, his words are in no way calm, but jagged, sharp-edged, painful things that rip their way out of his throat.]
I can't...I can't take this anymore. Just when I think I've lost everything I could possibly lose...
[He nuzzles further into her neck, trembling just a bit, taking in her warmth like a man dying of thirst takes in a glass of water. He really didn't expect to need this. Or, more accurately, he hadn't wanted to need this. He wanted to just put up a wall and keep his suffering private.
That didn't work and he just found himself feeling terribly alone, with only himself to blame.]
I don't want to lose anymore. Why can't I keep anything? Why does everything that keeps me going fall apart?
[She rocks him gently, curled around him as much as physically possible, her fingers on the nape of his neck and down his back, letting her touch sooth him as much as she could. There were no answers to his questions and her cheeks were wet as she presses her lips wherever they fall.]
You're not alone. [Her voice is soft and dear gods, she isn't sure if she can even help. But she's not leaving him, she refuses, and her hands brush over him as if she could pull them pain from him and tuck it away into herself. Ril may be small, but she does her best to wrap herself around him and give him as much as she can.]
[Despite the size difference, he buries himself up against her like a child, shivering for a while longer before he settles at her touch and gulps down the last bits of his grief.
And strangely enough, a sudden, watery chuckle bubbles up from him and he gives Ril another big squeeze.]
I'm sorry. Here you are, coming to me for comfort and I begin blubbering myself.
[Eight lifts his head and untangles an arm so he can dry his face, giving her a weak smile.]
No. [Her voice is quietly fierce, her fingers curling against his hair as she shakes her head, scattering her own tears down her cheeks.] No. Don't you dare apologize to me.
[She kisses his temple gently, carefully.]
Blubber all you like, I'm not leaving. [Ril lets out a soft sigh and brushes at a missed tear clinging to his cheek.] And it's easier. It's easier to take care of other than to deal with yourself. I kn-- [Her voice dies as she presses her lips against his hairline. When she finds words again, they're nearly inaudible.] I know.
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I can't...I can't take this anymore. Just when I think I've lost everything I could possibly lose...
[He nuzzles further into her neck, trembling just a bit, taking in her warmth like a man dying of thirst takes in a glass of water. He really didn't expect to need this. Or, more accurately, he hadn't wanted to need this. He wanted to just put up a wall and keep his suffering private.
That didn't work and he just found himself feeling terribly alone, with only himself to blame.]
I don't want to lose anymore. Why can't I keep anything? Why does everything that keeps me going fall apart?
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You're not alone. [Her voice is soft and dear gods, she isn't sure if she can even help. But she's not leaving him, she refuses, and her hands brush over him as if she could pull them pain from him and tuck it away into herself. Ril may be small, but she does her best to wrap herself around him and give him as much as she can.]
In this moment, you're not alone.
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And strangely enough, a sudden, watery chuckle bubbles up from him and he gives Ril another big squeeze.]
I'm sorry. Here you are, coming to me for comfort and I begin blubbering myself.
[Eight lifts his head and untangles an arm so he can dry his face, giving her a weak smile.]
no subject
[She kisses his temple gently, carefully.]
Blubber all you like, I'm not leaving. [Ril lets out a soft sigh and brushes at a missed tear clinging to his cheek.] And it's easier. It's easier to take care of other than to deal with yourself. I kn-- [Her voice dies as she presses her lips against his hairline. When she finds words again, they're nearly inaudible.] I know.
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I spent a long time not wanting anyone to take care of me. That I'd been enough of a burden. Still, if it makes you feel better...
[He gives her a tiny, teasing smile, brushing the pad of his thumb along her cheek to dry her tears.]
I'll stop being daft, then, just for you.